I just can’t

Critical moments of truth. Turning points on the faith journey. They stand out. 

And impact the rest of our lives.

For me, one of those began with, “I just can’t.”

Hungry to know Him

Freshman year at university. I was eager to grow in my faith. 

The year before I’d come to an understanding of the role the Holy Spirit plays in our lives. And discovered what it means to have a moment-by-moment relationship with the Lord.

Now I was hungry to know Him. Learning about spiritual disciplines. And seeking to have a consistent quiet time.

Living out her faith

Stephanie lived down the hall from me. She was an upperclass pharmacy major. I was studying art/interior design. Our classes definitely didn’t overlap.

But somehow we met. And I discovered she knew how to make my little dying houseplants come to life again. 

She also lived out her faith. With a consistency and discipline I wanted to imitate.

I asked her to disciple me.

I just can’t

We met for Bible study and prayer. Talked about anything and everything.  Things seemed to be moving right along.

Then, one day she came down the hall. Knocked on my door. Asked, “How are you doing?”

And the dam broke.

“I just can’t, Stephanie. I can’t read my Bible every day. I can’t memorize Scripture. I can’t pray for the whole world. I can’t witness to everybody on my hall. I just can’t!”

Not burdensome

She listened. Patiently. To my long list of inadequacies and shortcomings.

Then in her quiet, Southern drawl, spoke.

“Well, it’s about time you figured that out.”

She asked me to read aloud 1 John 5:3-5.

“In fact, this is love for God: to keep his commands.
And his commands are not burdensome,
for everyone  born of God overcomes the world.
This is the victory that has overcome the world,
even our faith.
Who is it that overcomes the world? Only the one who believes that Jesus is the Son of God.” 

Truth

Stephanie gently explained. “Did you hear that? His commands are not burdensome. When His commands become burdensome, somewhere along the way you’ve started trying to do everything on your own.”

Instead of abiding in Christ. Fully depending on Him. Walking by faith.

The truth flowed in that afternoon. Bringing conviction and freedom. 

Joy.

Signal to check

I’m not supposed to figure it all out on my own.

He gives discernment and wisdom for the journey. Day by day by day.

So, today, when I hear myself saying “I just can’t,” it’s a signal for me to check. And ask.

Am I piling a to-do list on my life without seeking Him first? 

Am I trying to do this all in my own strength? 

Am I willing to keep in step with the Spirit, learning from Him?

His yoke is easy

For this I know. Without a doubt. His commands are not burdensome.

His yoke is easy and His burden is light.

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you
and learn from Me,
for I am gentle and humble in heart,
and you will find rest for your souls.
For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.”
Matthew 11:28-30 NIV

What about you?

Are there some spiritual life lessons that stand out to you? Who did God use to teach you His ways? Thank the Lord for them today.

Related posts

Begin to know Him now – Someone else’s surrender – Abiding with little and much – Open to His Word – Take up His yoke –