Susan LaffertySeasoned servant. Leaving, after spending many years in the dark city by the river. Her parting advice to one of our colleagues is borne out of long experience in the spiritual battle.
Those insightful words reach my ears at a retreat in the Himalayas.
One phrase sticks in my heart. And comes to mind, from time to time.
“Do you want to seem holy? Or be holy?”
Several years ago, in the upheaval of an unexpected move to a different country, I’m struggling.
Questions speak loud. Wake me in the night.
What if it’s the wrong place?
What if it doesn’t work?
What if we can’t get permission to stay?
What if…?
Doubts about the future linger. Rising from underlying fear. In a long season of unanswered questions.
Wilderness. When the voice of the Beloved is silent. And the Word—so full of rivers and streams—feels like desert.
I remember thirst. And crying out. In a dark night of the soul. Longing for His instruction.
In the mornings, I waited. Asking.
Are You there? Can You hear me?
